What I See When I Close My Eyes.
When I close my eyes, This is what I see, A little girl with short blond hair watching scary shadows of two people fighting in their bedroom, I see a terrified child,and I sense the fear, I close my eyes harder,I think of something else,work it's going great, Oh wait, There's a little girl running towards her bedroom, She's packing her clothes,she's full of anger but I still sense her fear, She wants to go somewhere with someone,she has a destination,I can't tell where. I shut my eyes even harder, I try to concentrate on not thinking, Flowers,beautiful flowers blossoming on a sunny day, I like them flowers,I love red flowers, Red, Bottles of alcohol under my father's bed, My father's anger and bad temper, Sex with different women, My father's love, His kindness, His strength, His weakness, His terrible relationship with my brother, STOP! School days, Oh these were cool, Teenagers, crushes,my first boyfriend, The first time I had